Getting back on my feet

It's amazing that every time I feel like I am gaining some control over my life I must do something to screw it up. That's how I knew it was time to have another baby each time, life was getting a bit too easy. No, I'm not pregnant :) Last fall, I felt like life was going fairly smoothly so I decided to add a new business to the mix. After all the turmoil we'd gone through with changing our diets and seeing the incredible positive impact of that, I felt compelled to share that knowledge. Fortunately, I found a food company committed to the same and it was an easy way to share my hard earned knowledge with others. It is a joy, a passion, as well as both a source of stress relief and stress gain! It adds to my never ending to do list yet also adds to my sense of personal satisfaction.

In addition to my new business, I was also running a high stress, 6 month long project that just ended a couple of weeks ago. I have a bit of a reprieve at work and I took off a few days last week and finished up accounting for our other two businesses and pulling together all our tax information and dropped that off with our tax advisor. Another huge weight off my shoulders. I've finally started exercising again and am recommitting to putting my health at least on the to-do list. I'd love to say that any additional step I take will be to simplify, but I know myself too well to say that.

Morality without religion

I wish more people understand that the basic assumption that religion = morality and the inverse, no religion = immorality was inherantly flawed and disproved time and time again. Here's an interesting article speaking to this topic.

Happy New Year!

I'm not big into making New Year's resolutions because it usually takes less than a week for my resolutions to go down in flames. I was thinking that this year I could make resolutions that I'd really want to keep- drink more wine! sleep in more! have more sex! Sadly, I probably couldn't keep those either.

I do like the feeling of newness and freshness the new year brings. The anticipation of what the year will bring, what new things the kids will be doing and saying and understanding. There are many things that I would like to do better than last year but mostly what I hope for is more quality time with the family and good health for my family and friends.

Hard to believe

That is has been 3 months since I have posted! In the past 3 months, I have started up a new business selling all natural food products, reapplied for my full time job in hopes of keeping it due to a reorganization, finished up the fall ball season with Bubby's team winning the championship, sailed through Halloween and Thanksgiving, and started preparations for Hanukah and Christmas.

Sudsy is more and more fun and spoiled every day. I should have know the moment these words left my lips that we were doomed...."I would never treat the third child any different than the others so there is now way the baby will grow up to be dependent and spoiled." We most certainly do treat him different and even when we do try to tow the line, one of the big kids will give in to his every demand.

Smoochie has moved up to the next level in gymnastics and still continues to cartwheel, flip and handstand on every flat or not flat surface she can find. We had snowfall for about 4 hours last week and the kids were able to have snowball fights and make snowmen and snow angels. Quite a luxury for us in south Texas.

I can't believe how fast the time is flying. I wish I could bottle it and save it forever.

Through the eyes of a child

I am finally downloading the pics off the new camera and I find that the camera has made it's way into little hands... enjoy the view....

Simplify finances

I'm obsessed with simplifying. After all, every minute saved doing something productive means another minute I can spend doing something unproductive. For the bills, I have everything set up and goes out automatically. I used to maintain a spreadsheet that itemized our cash flow and separated everything into categories so we could easily see where our money went. It took way too much time to maintain, so currently we have a 'rough idea' of where our money goes.

I already use QuickBooks for our businesses, but the banks we use for our personal finances does not support QB and quite frankly, it's much too complicated for our personal finances. I looked into Quicken, but I don't want to have two different gigantic financial software competing for space on my hard drive.

Any suggestions on how to automatic my budget tracking without too much complication, expense or time required?

Updates

Work is crazy busy. I'm on a fast track project that we can't agree on anything and we keep redoing everything so it feels like I'll never finish but we have to finish. To sum it up at work: stressed.

School is now in full swing and baseball season has begun. Coach has decided Bubby is the pick for the required 9 year old pitching and since he just started kid pitch, we have lots of practicing to do. Every evening is baseball and we're still doing the twice a week 2.5 hour gymnastics practice.

One of our rent houses is eating our lunch and hubby has been spending every Tuesday and Thursday (the days Sudsy is in day care) killing himself trying to keep the house from falling down.

That's all.

Feingold

Sometimes I feel like I am stuck between two worlds. In one world, I am an a cynic, an engineer, an immediate disbeliever in anything organized- religion, government, and so on. I need to see and feel something to believe it.

The other world is the mother in me. Bubby has struggled in school (and at home) since he was a young child with listening and following instructions. We tried every intervention possible short of medicine. In desperation, we tried Feingold. The program eliminates artificial colors, dyes, sugars and BH* preservatives from both diet and anything with contact on the skin or inhalation. It did make some sense after seeing the effect of red gatorade on Smoochie. However, the cynic in me wondered how a simple change like this could possibly help.

When it came to the choice between trying Feingold and homeschooling Bubby (as the school was threatening to suspend if we didn't medicate), we chose Feingold as medication was not an option for us. Honestly, I never expected the Feingold program to be the answer we had been searching for. Not only did the program work for us as evidenced by teachers who did not even know about the changes we had made to the fact we no longer had regularly scheduled meetings with his teachers, the principal and the school counselor.

Now I have been introduced into an entirely different world. This is a world that is open to all kinds of ideas that are not proven, not known and are quite controversial. Sometimes it is difficult to bridge the difference between the two but somehow in my mind, I have made peace and sense of it all.

Secret Blog

I've been accused of starting up a secret blog (Sara). I didn't think it was a secret, but apparently it was. So here is the big announcement- I've started up a new blog with two of my friends. We have decided to be each other's back up and support for all things health related- mental, emotional, physical and the blog is a way for us to keep in touch and on track. I've tried to start up a blog dedicated to my health before but I can barely keep up with this one much less another one on my own.

Here is the brand new, secret now no longer a secret blog!!!:

*drumroll please*

Support Sisters

Making some progress

We are doing fairly well with our new plan. Granted, this is week 1, but still. The kids and I laid out all the clothes for the week and this has saved so much time in the mornings. Instead of the usual arguing and stalling, they simply pick up the next outfit in the stack (hah, not really but they do grab something) and get dressed without any lip.

Every night this week (all three of them), DH or myself has prepared the lunches for the next day so we don't have the mad scramble the next morning. Progress has been made on at least one load of laundry every day. Best of all, I have a system for dinners now.

The weekend before, I plan out the meals for the week and try to gather all the ingredients. I write down the list of meals on the white board in the mudroom. I bought a small white board for the kitchen on which I write down the next evenings meal before we go to sleep. I also place any daily activities/things to remember on the little white board. I have a giant white board with the month in the mudroom, but since we don't live in the mudroom like we do the kitchen, it's nice to have the reminders right in front of us.

Today's board reads:
Wednesday
Family Fun Night!
Make your own pizzas
Bike ride and dominos

Family fun night

It seems that when each weekend arrives, I throw myself a mini-pity party. Hubby works weekends do we don't get to do the fun family stuff that I'd like. Instead of feeling sorry for us, I decided to take action. Who says that fun family activities can only happen on weekends? We have declared Wednesday night Family Fun Night. We will probably have to shift the shedule a bit when baseball starts up this fall, but for now, Wednesdays work great.

Last night was our first Family Fun Night. We decided to go bowling. I'm wondering when bowling got so expensive? $45 for a four of us for one game? That seems quite steep. I am now looking for ideas for our weekly adventures, preferably ones that don't cost money.

Here is what we have on the list so far:

- family bike ride
- roller skating
- getting gelato from Whole Foods
- driving range
- rock wall at the gym
- Astros game
- we have tickets in December to see The Sound of Music
- movies

Setting mini-goals

One of my favorite activities is to brainstorm ways to simplify. If I instead spent the time doing instead of thinking, I'd probably get more accomplished but what's the fun in that?

One of the big issues around the house is putting things away. The kids (and us) will leave one or two little things out and before you know it, the house is completely trashed. Once it starts piling up, all effort goes out the window which makes it doubly bad.

How to make life a little simpler? Keep on top of it. We've made a pact to implement a new idea every week.

Here are just a few that we've come up with:

- lay out school clothes for the entire week on Sunday
- pick out meals/recipes for the week on Sunday
- do not go to sleep unless the sink is clean
- run the dishwasher every night
- do a load of laundry a day (side note: only do one family member's clothes at a time to ease the put away stress)
- if you get something out, you put it away

What tips/tricks do you have for making life a bit more simple?

Dinner and laundry

I have issues with both and would like to see them struck from everyone's to do list. In the mean time, I have figured out one way to make dinner less of an issue. My biggest problem is that I don't want to make the same dinner twice. Maybe once or twice a year but certainly not once a week or even once a month. That makes planning and coming up with ideas terribly hard. To make it a bit easier, I've added breakfast for dinner once a week. Last week was blueberry pancakes and sausage, this week was veggie frittata and breakfast tacos for the non-veggie eaters. I've also taken to the meals to go at Whole Foods. I have to grocery shop there once a week anyways, so I make it a week night trip and pick up prepared food.

The laundry problem is still a stinking mountain. I know people that do a load a day and while that is admirable, I just can't bring myself to get into the habit. I am too exhausted during the week to even think about laundry which means I get to waste the wonderful weekend swimming in 8 - 10 loads of clothes.

I think the solution is a personal chef and maid that comes every day. Anyone have advice on how to become independently wealthy so I can hire both?

My List

I have a long list of things I'd like to do in my lifetime. Some may be realistic, some not as much but I've been thinking about my list lately and how I'm not really any closer to any of the items. I need to focus on a couple and do something, otherwise they'll never happen on their own.

Here is my list, in no particular order:

- travel by train across a beautiful part of the country (ie Colorado, California coast...)
- learn how to dance hip-hop, salsa, jive, all of it
- go to bartending school
- get good enough at golf where I'm not embarrassed to play with others
- complete a half Ironman (running a marathon pretty much cured me of my desire to do a full Ironman)
- passive cash flow exceed expenses
- learn how to play the drums
- take a year off from our lives and travel the world with the kids visiting off the beaten path places
- play golf at Pebble Beach
- hike the Grand Canyon
- visit all 50 states
- volunteer for the local women's shelter
- be my own boss
- grow vegetables
- have a fruit orchard
- make my own wine
- become fluent in Spanish
- try bananas foster

Brutally honest, so maybe tone deaf?

One of our favorite family television programs is America's Got Talent. It is one of the few programs that we all enjoy. Mythbusters also falls into this category. Whenever a singer is on, the kids turn to me and say I should go on the show. Every time they then as me to sing something just to confirm. Then Bubby sings and he insists he would win. Then Smoochie sings and Bubby says she wouldn't win. Then Daddy sings and we all laugh.

The funny thing is, the kids are brutally honest, although Smoochie is usually able to soften the blow. For example, Bubby telling me that I need to go on Biggest Loser. Smoochie just tells me that I'm not skinny. Back to the singing, I can carry a tune, but I am certainly no rock star. So I find it amusing the kids think I could go on America's Got Talent and not get booed off the stage.

Bunkers?

I am more than a little curious with the level of hysteria that seems to be bubbling right under the surface. Rumors of ammunition shortages from people stocking up. People stating over and over in various conversations "we just don't know what is going to happen". While searching for the Feingold approved dino nuggets on the Costco website, I come across a whole selection of shelf stable, prepackaged foods. A 6 month, 4 person supply for 2 grand and people are buying this?

Is it normal human nature to assume the worst will happen? Are we entering another 'cold war era' where everyone builds underground bunkers and stocks it with supplies? Am I missing something by not buying into all of it?

The princess and the pea

Ahhh, sweet mattress. You are the best of times and the worst of times. Ever since moving into the new house, Hubby has had problems with his back. He went to a chiropractor and a massage therapist with regularity. He insisted his back hurt every morning. I on the other hand woke up rested and peaceful.

Fast forward a few months and I ended up sleeping on his side of the bed and I woke up with a sore back. We switched the bed around and now I'm in such pain I can hardly move. I spent an hour and a half with the massage therapist and now I'm bruised and in pain.

Now we have to decide on a mattress. Anyone have a sleep number bed?

No coherant thoughts

It is so freaking hot!! It has not rained the entire month of June and the heat index is well over 100. We're used to this weather for a bit in August, but at least we usually get a little relief with some rain. Everything is crispy and it will be interesting to see if the fireworks are allowed this 4th of July. Talks of a water ban and we just did our landscaping including a new maple tree. That would not be good.

In other news, I'm saddened by the news from Jon and Kate. I'm not a regular viewer of the show, but I've seen enough to form an opinion. Not only do those poor kids have to live with cameras in there faces for fun family outings, but now they get the break up of their parents marriage and I'm sure all the nightmares to come recorded on film. I can only imagine how difficult it is to raise 8 children but I would have much more respect for them if they chose to save their family instead of their show.

Last night was Bubby's 'birthday party'. We're trying something new this year. Every year, I put together a big party for each kid and then we have a separate party just for family. It is exhausting and expensive, so this year we've dialed it back. Bubby had 4 friends spend the night and we set up sprinklers in the backyard and let them jump on the trampoline until they nearly passed out, fed them pizza and a cupcake and turned on a scary movie. They were all very well behaved and having 5 nine year old boys in the house was much easier than I anticipated.

Smoochie chose to spend the night with a friend rather than tough it out with the boys. Hubby had the boys under control, so I decided to head to bed around 11 since I had to work today. I'm almost asleep and the phone rings and Hubby had to go get Smoochie because she was scared. I was finally able to get back to sleep around midnight after they got back.

By the way, if you plan on taking children other than your own to swim at Lifetime Fitness, you must have waivers filled out for all the children. Oh, and the city pool in our city closes at 6:50 pm during the week. Despite all of that, I think they all had a great time.

Hilarious

We just returned from a 10 day vacation in California. We started off in San Diego (thanks to the lovely aspect of standy flying) and drove to LA. We spent the day in Disneyland and then picked up our RV for the week to drive up the coast. All five of us, in a 31 foot trailer. Lots of family time and I will post pictures soon.

We just returned home tonight and our bodies have not adjusted to Central standard time, so we're sitting around the dinner table eating pizza at 10 pm. Somehow we got on the subject of baby names and I would get caught up in the conversation until I realized what we were talking about and would exclaim- HEY! No more babies!!! The kids are emphatic that they want a little brother and sister so after one refusal on my part, Bubby turns to Hubby and says- Hey Daddy! Sneak in there!! We were all in tears.

Later on in the dinner conversation, Hubby tells Smoochie that she needs to get her back pack off the floor. Apparently some of the educational aspects of the trip paid off and she tells him that the floor is her backpack's natural habitat.

It's weird being back to what now feels like our giant sized house. The close quarters definetely brought us closer together.

Advocate

After a recent run in with an assistant coach on Bubby's baseball team, I have been trying to make sense of the lesson I need to learn from it. Our parenting style has always been a little more laid back. We purposefully try not to shield our children from the world, but try to use each instance as a learning opportunity. On the flip side, we don't intentionally expose them either, but our main objective is to raise self reliant children that have confidence in themselves and their abilities and to be thoughtful and kind to those around them.

Back to the baseball saga, one coach in particular would try to adjust Bubby's swing and stance in the middle of his bat. I could see my son getting rattled and could see that most of the time, the coach was telling him opposite of what he should be doing. He's been playing long enough to know where to stand in the box. I asked one of the helper dads to pass the message on to please stop adjusting him while at bat. The coach then proceeded to call me over to the dugout and chew me out. In front of all the players and the parents telling me that he heard the calls I was giving him (all I ever say is to watch the ball and you can do it) and that I was a terrible coach and he sees my son getting all emotional because of me. He continued on and I again repeated my request with no judgement attached. Finally I had enough and just walked off. After the fact I find out that he has quite a reputation and I am not the first that he has attacked or even the first that day.

I've been mulling over the lesson in this for me. I finally realized something that is probably so obvious to all parents, I just must be really slow on the uptake. There are adults in this world that are involved in helping children to serve their own needs and not the needs of the children. My job is step in when those situations arise and be my child's advocate. That is not a life lesson they should learn on their own. Looking back, I wish I had done more to help him with his teacher last year who was down right evil. I wish I had stood up to her and the school to tell them it was not ok in addition to just telling my son that sometimes you get teachers (or bosses) that are not nice and you just have to bear it. I wish I had done more. Finding the right balance will be a challenge, but no one knows Bubby better than his father and I and he needs to know that we are his advocate.