Wish upon a star

The boy asks me the other day how come wishes don't come true. He wished on a shooting star and nothing happened. I asked him what he wished for, thinking it would be something I could produce, and he tells me he wished for monkeys. Not exactly the answer I was expecting.

Rhyme

The boy's baby cousin was playing on the floor and one of my friends asked him what was the baby's name. He answers- it's Marlen, darlin'.

Let's play the opposite game!

My in-laws were taking the boy to his favorite fast food restaurant- the golden arches or as he calls it, dark tunnel and he explained the rules on the way there. If I say that I want chicken nuggets, then I want a hamburger. If I say I want milk, then I want a soda. If I say I want a hamburger, then I want chicken nuggets and if I say soda, then I want milk.

When the reach the counter, my father-in-law asks the boy what he wants to eat. "I want chicken nuggets and milk." My mother-in-law then asks if he really wants that or if he's playing opposite. He answers firmly that he wants chicken nuggets and milk. My father-in-law tells the clerk he wants a hamburger and soda. My mother-in-law then exclaims- "I'm confused"!

5 years old

I can't believe how quickly my little boy is growing up. Friday evening hubby and I and my folks gathered around the pool to watch his final swimming lesson. It's been 2 weeks for 30 minutes every weekday evening. And he's doing great. He knows how to put his head down and stroke his arms and turn his head to the side to breathe.

Saturday was his birthday and we had his party in the evening so that the outdoors were a little cooler and the house would be blocking the sun. The 10' water slide moonwalk was a huge hit and the thunderstorm held off until it was time for cake and ice cream. The kids seemed to have a great time.

Today it's a Father's day celebration at my parent's and then we're off to Atlanta to visit friends. Gotta love summer.

Breaking news!

I flip on the tv last night and several minutes into the program breaking news interrupts. My heart races a bit, after a week without television, I'm not used to the sensationalism. "We interrupt this program to inform you that nine counties are without power tonight. " Wow, I bet all those people without power are so happy you came in with this breaking news.

Life lesson #1023

Never let your five year old apply sunscreen on your back when you're spending the day at the beach.

Yes Sir!

The girl's latest is to answer all questions with yes, sir. Well, except the questions she answers no (she is turning 2 next month). It is absolutely hilarious to hear her tiny little voice saying yes sir. She says it to both of us and I always correct her with yes m'am. Then she answers 'yes sir man'. The girl is very polite and has much better manners than her 5 year old brother. Not sure why it takes with one and not the other, but we're not giving up hope on the boy. He is good about saying thank you.

Addiction

I am addicted to television. I love to space out in front of the tv in the evenings, emptying my mind of any useful thoughts. It helps me to unwind. It also prevents me from talking and spending quality time with my husband. And so, I have agreed to give up television for one week. I made it through day 1 with flying colors. Until I tried to go to sleep last night. Too many thoughts/worries/concerns about the day flowing through my head to fall asleep.

I'm hoping this no tv rule does not apply to the weekend, when hubby's not home. I'll have 4 Oprah shows to catch up on! Sick, I know.

Unbelievable

I got a strange phone call Friday evening. Someone trying to reach my neighbor and her phone was busy for the last three days. This caller seems very concerned and tells me it is very important she reaches her. I don't recognize the name, so she gives me her address. She lives several houses down, across the street from our old house. I take the message down- have her call Mrs. Buchanan at 888-......, claim number....., tell her it is extremely important. I am concerned up until the 888 phone number. Wow, a creditor! You have got to be kidding me. So now, they don't only harass the debtor, but the neighbors as well??? How is THAT legal?

Audit

My project is going through a technical audit right now. Just to make sure I've been following all the procedures and that nothing fell through the cracks. Seems like a smart idea, right? Well, the auditor just handed me the sheets to fill out for him. Hmmmm, he's supposed to be auditing me and now he wants me to fill out the report? Everything looks great from here.

I want one of those!

Hubby has a gold tooth. Really, it's just a filling but my son is fascinated with it. The other night, the boy complained about one of his teeth hurting and we mentioned if it kept hurting, we'd have to take him to the dentist and he might need a filling. This, apparently, was his plan. He gets excited and says that he wants to go. I tell him it will hurt.

"That's ok. I'm brave. I might cry, but that's ok."

Hmmm, might need another tactic. Hubby tells him, you don't want one of these. The boy answers, oh yes I do. So, hubby says tomorrow, I'll get my drill and my biggest drill bit and I'll drill out the cavity and then hammer metal into it. The boy goes to bed happy.

The next day, while swinging on the playground, the boy calls out to his dad. "Dad! Come here! I've got a secret for you. I need to tell you in the garage." They move to the garage and he whispers "I'm ready for my filling now". Hubby gets the drill and hammer and the boy, still unfazed asks, what metal he was going to use. He wants something shiny. Hubby tells him it will have to wait until he gets the right metal. Fortunately, the boy must have decided a little bling in him mouth is not all that.

What did you say???

Last weekend, the boy said "fart on me" when he passed gas. He happened to be with my parents and the time, so my mother says to him incredulously - what did you say and then he repeats it for her like it's what he's supposed to say. She then begins the interrogation- that is not nice to say that, who taught you how to say that, etc. The boy tells him Pawpi (my father) says that. My mom finally puts it all together and tells him, no, Pawpi says "pardon me". The boy simply responds 'oh'.

Isn't instant messaging great?

I am sitting in my office and sneezed. My coworker who sits 2 offices away instant messages me "bless you". I write him back "thank you". He answers "I didn't want to yell".

Random thoughts and observations about myself

It bothers me to no end when the cook time is left on the microwave. I must push the button to clear it and return to the clock, however, a pair of dirty socks left by the back door doesn't get to me for weeks.

I used to have tons of drive and motivation. Now the only way I'll do things is if the deadline is looming right over my head. I also used to do the tasks I hated most first. Now I procrastinate in hopes it will go away.

I am just like my mother no matter how hard I try.

I drank too much Saturday night and had a hangover for two entire days. Getting old sucks. Sad part is I wasn't even drunk.

I have a love/hate relationship with my job. I love working with the people, hate the work. I do enjoy having people do the work for me., however.

I've been blogging for a year and my writing skills have not improved a bit.

Searching for motivation

Before kids, I was an active, moderately in shape individual. I ate healthy the majority of the time, exercised regularly, and kept my weight in check. After my son was born, I resumed my regular exercise routine and after 2 years, was finally back to my prepregnancy weight. I assumed the same would happen with my daughter. No such luck. I have turned into a sloth. And I have never been so out of shape.

I went out of town for work last week and I took advantage of the time to myself. I "ran" on the treadmill at the hotel, swam in the pool, and scrapbooked all week long. And since I've been back home, I have not exercised once. Please, please someone lend me some words of inspiration. I can't take this much longer. I want to wear my clothes again and to be able to run a few miles without wishing I would die.

Words of inspiration

http://www.despair.com/indem.html

It's the little things in life

My daughter has a favorite stuffed animal which is a frog. When she says frog, the 'r' is silent, the 'o' sounds more like a 'u', and the 'g' is pronounced 'k". So, she's walking around this evening holding her favorite stuff frog saying 'f#ck mommy, f#ck' over and over again. Hubby and I just look at each other and start cracking up.

Don't even get me started on the silent 'r' in shirt.

My list

I'm sure everyone has a list of things they'd like to do sometime during their lifetime. Haven't had much time to think about mine lately, but I thought I'd revisit:

Completed Items (in no particular order):
- graduate high school in 3 years
- become a lead on a project
- run a marathon
- natural child birth
- jump out of a perfectly good airplane
- marry my soul mate
- produce adorable offspring
- get my ears double pierced
- start my own business
- take my kids to Disney World

Items Yet to be Completed:
- complete an ironman event
- create a successful business
- raise well adjusted, self sufficient, empathetic young adults
- quit my day job
- become 'rich' - i.e. passive income exceeds monthly expenses
- buy a hot car that's totally impractical
- scuba dive
- open a bed and breakfast
- write better
- play the drums
- sing in a band
- become a better person
- travel the world
- live overseas
- visit every state in the U.S.

The logic of a child

The boy tells us that his sister's nose is running. Daddy asks where is it running to? The boy answers her mouth. I start laughing and the boy is now confused and asks if Daddy said something funny.

The boy

The boy has been taking things out of his classmates bags at school which then end up in his bag. His teachers and ourselves are taking these acts of stealing very seriously. Trying to come up with appropriate discipline measures, the husband acts, where can we get a paddle? I answer cpscomeandtakemykids.com has a good selection.

I stopped at Sam's Club on the way home yesterday and the boy checks out each sample station to give his cute face for preferential treatment. He is disappointed at the toothpaste station until the lady gives him a little tube of toothpaste. He has to show it off to the cashier and she asks him, do you brush your teeth in the morning and at night? He says, I do at night, but sometimes my mommy forgets in the morning. Thanks, kid.